Mated to My Fiancé’s Alpha King Brother - Chapter 187

Chapter 187: Chapter 187
Seraphina’s POV

The door to my apartment slammed shut behind me.

I pressed my back against it, sliding down until I hit the floor. My hands were shaking. My whole body was shaking.

I couldn’t breathe.

The image was burned into my brain. Damien. Standing there with *her*. That woman with the perfect smile and the perfect dress and the perfect everything. The way she’d touched his arm. The way she’d looked at Lily and Adrian like they were already hers.

My children.

*Breathe, Sera. Just breathe.*

But I couldn’t. My chest felt like someone had reached inside and crushed my lungs into powder.

The tears came hot and fast, streaming down my face before I could stop them. I wrapped my arms around my knees and let myself break apart right there on the floor.

Damien had moved on.

Of course he had. What did I expect? That he’d wait forever for a wife who’d abandoned him and their children? That he’d spend the rest of his life alone, pining for someone who wasn’t good enough for him in the first place?

The woman flashed through my mind again. Pretty. Poised. Put-together. Everything I wasn’t.

God, she’d probably been waiting for me to leave. Probably saw me as the obstacle between her and everything she wanted.

*Stop it. Stop torturing yourself.*

But I couldn’t stop. My brain kept replaying every detail. The way Damien had stood next to her. The way they’d walked together toward that expensive car. Had they looked comfortable together? Happy?

Did he love her?

The thought sent a fresh wave of pain through my chest, so sharp I actually gasped.

I pressed my hands over my mouth to muffle the sob that tore out of me. The neighbors didn’t need to hear me falling apart. Again.

Lily and Adrian. Where were they?

Were they at home? With a nanny? Or were they *there*, at that party, and I’d just missed them?

Were they okay?

The question sat in my stomach like acid. Adrian would be eight now. Did he still love dinosaurs? Still read those science books he’d been obsessed with?

And Lily. God. Lily was three years old. She’d been a baby when I left. A tiny, perfect baby who’d wrapped her little hand around my finger and owned my whole heart.

Did she even remember me?

My whole body started shaking harder. I pulled my knees tighter to my chest, trying to physically hold myself together.

What if that woman—*she*, the one with the perfect smile—what if she was their stepmother now? What if she was tucking them in at night? Reading them bedtime stories? Kissing their foreheads and telling them she loved them?

What if she was mean to them when Damien wasn’t looking?

The thought made me physically ill. I scrambled to my feet and barely made it to the bathroom before I threw up.

I knelt on the cold tile, my forehead pressed against the toilet seat, and let myself cry. Really cry. The kind of crying that came from somewhere deep and broken inside.

What if Damien had more children with her? New babies. His new family.

Would he still love Adrian and Lily the same way? Or would they become the reminders of his failed first marriage? The baggage from his broken past?

*Stop. Stop thinking like this.*

I dragged myself up and splashed cold water on my face. My reflection in the mirror looked like death. Eyes swollen and red. Hair a mess.

I looked exactly like what I was. A woman who’d thrown away everything good in her life and was now paying the price.

I stumbled into the living room and collapsed onto the couch. My apartment suddenly felt too small. Too quiet. Too empty.

Everything was empty without them.

I grabbed my phone, pulling up old photos I’d saved before I left. Adrian’s first day of school. Lily’s first blink. The four of us at the park, Damien’s arm around my waist, both kids grinning at the camera.

We’d looked so happy.

Before I ruined everything.

*I miss them. God, I miss them so much.*

The pain was unbearable. Physical. Like someone had taken a knife and carved out everything vital inside me.

I cried until I had nothing left. Until my throat was raw and my head pounded and my eyes felt like sandpaper.

The apartment grew dark around me. I didn’t bother turning on the lights.

I just lay there on the couch, staring at nothing, remembering everything.

Had he already forgotten about me?

*Maybe that’s for the best,* some rational part of my brain whispered. *Maybe it’s better if he’s happy.*

But it didn’t feel better. It felt like dying.

I must have fallen asleep eventually, because I woke up to sunlight streaming through the windows and a headache so brutal I could barely move.

My phone said 11:47 AM.

I’d slept for over twelve hours.

My body ached. My eyes were crusted shut with dried tears. My throat felt like I’d swallowed glass.

I dragged myself to the bathroom and stood under the shower until the water ran cold. Then I threw on sweatpants and a t-shirt and stared at my reflection again.

Still looked like death. But marginally better than last night.

I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t sit here and think about them. About Damien and his new life and my children growing up without me.

I’d go crazy.

I needed to do something. Anything. Something to make my brain stop replaying those images. Something to make the pain go away, even for a little while.

My eyes fell on my phone.

Rico.

Training. Fighting. Pain I could control. Pain with a purpose.

I grabbed my phone before I could second-guess myself and pulled up his contact.

He answered on the second ring. “Sera! What’s up? You okay? You sound rough.”

“I’m fine,” I lied. My voice came out hoarse and broken. “I need more fights.”

“More fights? You’ve already got two scheduled for this month.”

“I need more.” The words came out desperate. Frantic. “As many as you can get me. “